The Nazi Clown Car

Why is this blog named Nazi Clown Car? Simple. The phrase was suggested by my wife as the best descriptor of our most bizarre adventure to date. The odd thing is that our group's Role Playing campaigns are not meant to be comic, humorous or bizarre. The games that I and the other GMs run are (for the most part) meant to be straight adventures. However things often take a strange turn or we are brought to tears laughing at the strangest phrases uttered by one player or another. This particular game is one in which I was a player, not the GM. It was played using the Octane system. It went something like this:

We were playing normals-- human beings with abilities only slightly above those of average people. The game was set in the modern era. We were working as investigators when we stumbled upon a circus that was being used as the front for a strange cattle rustling operation. As we were busy investigating a Clown Car plastered with a Swastika drove up and a horde of Nazi Clowns poured out of the tiny auto and began attacking us. This led to one of the all time classic Toddisms.

A Toddism is what I call a hilarious line or phrase uttered during a game that cracks up everybody. They are--more often than not-- uttered by Todd, one of our regular gamers... but could come from anyone. This will often lead to the expression "I never thought I'd hear the words such & such and so & so uttered together in the same sentence", usually uttered by Doug.

Well, the Nazi Clowns, having come pouring out of their Nazi Clown Car (in fact I seem to recall it may have been a Nazi Clown Car Tank?!? Didn't it have a gun and turret on the front? Maybe not...), began attacking us. One method of attack was to fire themselves as human cannonballs at our characters. This near-fatal attack on Todd's character brought the classic Toddism line, "I took a midget to the chest and nearly died!"

Eventually we defeated the Nazi clowns and midgets and began poking around. We discovered that occult ritual sacrifices were being performed. Humans were being sacrificed and having their souls put into cows. These cows were loaded onto train cars and shipped to New York. We stripped the Swastikas off the Clown Car Tank and took it with us to New York. There we found the cows being off loaded from the train and there was a cattle drive towards Ellis Island.

When we arrived at Ellis Island there was a giant Drive-in Movie Screen set up where all the cows were being shown being slaughtered. This released all the human souls and created enough Occult Energy to open a Time Portal to 1939 Germany where the Nazis were enacting their master plan. Their plan was to bring all of their planes and bombs and other 70 year old technology to the U.S.A. in the present where they could strike at the Americans and win the war before we even entered it. Luckily our characters were there to stop this crafty plan. We jumped through the Time Portal and killed the Nazi in charge of the operation and his henchman and shut down the Time Portal. Thus ended the adventure of the "Time Travelling-Occult-Nazi-Cattle Rustling-Midget Clowns!"